


Secret Bets & Safety Belts

by the_forgotten_friend



Category: 9-1-1 (TV)
Genre: Bottom Evan "Buck" Buckley, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Fluff and Smut, Friends to Lovers, I Will Go Down With This Ship, M/M, Tags Are Hard
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-12-05
Updated: 2019-12-25
Packaged: 2021-02-25 23:21:58
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 8,728
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21683662
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/the_forgotten_friend/pseuds/the_forgotten_friend
Summary: Everyone can see it, except for Buck and Eddie. The crew all have bets on when the inevitable will happen. As the holidays approach, everyone gets more and more restless.
Relationships: Evan "Buck" Buckley/Eddie Diaz
Comments: 19
Kudos: 451





	1. Chapter 1

"It's got to be soon," Chim muttered to Hen.

She gave a short laugh, "Your deadline passed already, now it's just me and Bobby."

They were trying not to be too obvious, watching Eddie and Buck talking in the kitchen, Eddie leaned against one counter and Buck directly across from him. The two men were so at ease, yet so tense at the same time that it made Hen's chest tighten. She remembered what that had been like, but wished she could smack them both and tell them to get it over with already. 

"I for sure thought Thanksgiving would be their downfall," Chim sighed, throwing his hands up dramatically. 

"Nah, I'm telling you, New Year's is gonna be the day. Emotions run high, excitement for the new beginning bubbles up and you just can't help yourself, you've gotta kiss someone." Hen grinned.

Something Buck said made Eddie laugh, throwing his head back. The look of longing on Buck's face when his friend couldn't see was so intimate and private Hen had to look away. Poor kid. 

The alarms went off, and they all jumped up and headed to the trucks.

~~~

Buck kicked himself the whole way back to the station. What was he thinking, telling those kids that _particular_ Santa wasn't real? He kept his eyes on the floor, not wanting to meet Eddie's eyes.

Of course, his best friend just wouldn't let it drop. Even the sound of his laughter, which normally made him feel this weird bubbly feeling in his chest, didn't make him feel better. 

"I thought that kids dad was going to hit you!" He cackled.

"I didn't mean it like that!" Buck snapped, "I kind of wish he would have though. I ruined their Christmas."

Eddie's smile faltered a little, "C'mon Buck, no you didn't. Kids bounce back. Besides, if he had hit you, we wouldn't be sitting here right now. You might be, but I'd be in jail."

Buck blinked, his brow furrowing, "What, why?"

Now it was Eddie's turn to look at the floor. He seemed to fumble for words, a slow blush creeping up his neck.

"W-well, because I can't just let someone beat up my best friend! I'd have to stand up for you. What would Christopher think if I let you lose to some mall dad?"

He still wouldn't look at Buck, but was now focused on his hands, which were flexing in his lap. Buck took the opportunity to check him out, while there was no one around to notice. The rigid set of his shoulders was a familiar sight, he always seemed wound too tight these days.

Buck felt himself smile, "What makes you think I'd lose? I can fight."

Eddie snorted, shoulders dropping and the tense moment seemed to be gone, "I'm not saying you can't, I'm just saying I'm better."

"Oh yeah?" Buck laughed, "We have to see about that! I bet I could take you."

Eddie was quiet for a minute, before he broke out in to a wide grin, "You're so on."

~~~

Bobby, trying his best not to listen over the headset, couldn't help but smile. Those first few days of tension seemed to be well forgotten by the two newest members of his team. Eddie had taken the lawsuit the hardest, even harder than Bobby himself. He had considered Buck like a son to him, and he would be lying if he said that it didn't hurt him when Buck sued for his job back. Eddie, however, had just seemed to shut down. He became broody, angry, and closed off from the team. That was when he had first started to speculate there was more between the two young men.

As time progressed and things fell back in to routine, that speculation became known to everyone, except of course, the two in the middle of it all. Normally he wasn't a betting man, but at the rate things were going he was sure Christmas would be the day it all came to a head. If only they didn't have to work...

~~~

"This is stupid," Eddie laughed.

They were at the gym, thankfully it was nearly empty, except for the young girl on her phone at the front desk. Eddie came here often since he stopped fighting, the punching bags here were pretty great, in a room off to the side, also fitted with sparring mats.

Buck, standing across from him, bounced in place with his fists raised, borrowed gloves far too close to his face, "No way, I have a point to prove."

Eddie rolled his eyes, "I can't believe this is how I'm spending a day off. You know, I should be working on Christopher's list."

"We can do that after, it'll go faster with two anyway. Now, put em up, unless you're scared?"

"You do realize I was doing this for fun not too long ago, right? And I got carried away?" He felt worry bubble up inside him, "I don't know what you're trying to prove here."

Buck grinned at him, "That you're not the only tough guy on the team, and that I can take you. For real, not just in a video game."

Eddie couldn't help the shiver up his spine when Buck said he could take him. Oh, how he would love to test that statement. To kiss the cocky grin from Buck's lips and let his hands wander...

"Fine, if you're so sure. Just don't cry when you lose."

He waited, knowing Buck would make the first move. He was too impatient, ready to leap in to action. He didn't disappoint, almost immediately lunging toward Eddie's chest. He dodged quickly, hitting his shoulder as it passed him and knocking Buck off course. He landed clumsily on the mat and glared up at Eddie, blue eyes blazing. 

"C'mon tough guy," Eddie taunted. 

It became almost like a dance, with Eddie being one step ahead of Buck every time, and hitting him hard in the shoulders each time he had a shot. He just couldn't bring himself to go for anything too important. His method seemed to be working, with every pass Buck seemed to have more trouble raising his arms. He knew it was kind of a cheap move, but he didn't want to risk actually hurting him, which he feared would happen if he let himself get too carried away. 

Buck swore and backed away, "This is bullshit!"

"I told you-" Eddie began, but Buck cut him off.

"You're holding back. I can tell. More than just in here. I know you're still pissed off, still on edge, and fighting was your escape. Is that how you did it, just dodging and going for the shoulders? 'Cause that's pretty shitty." He stalked over to Eddie, till they were inches apart, his gloves resting on Eddie's chest.

They were both breathing heavily, and as Eddie opened his mouth to tell Buck he was just trying to stay in control, he felt Buck push him away and swing towards his stomach. Finally, a blow hit it's mark. He doubled over as the air left his lungs, and sensed Buck hesitate. He took advantage of the pause and threw his arms around Buck's waist, grappling him to the floor and pinning him on his stomach underneath him, holding his arm at an angle.

"Tap out," Eddie said.

Buck squirmed, "Hell no!"

Eddie applied more pressure to Buck's arm, trying to ignore the thoughts invading his brain as he looked down at Buck. He could see the flush rising from his neck to his ears, and wondered if it was creeping up his chest as well. He couldn't help himself, he leaned down and put his mouth close to Buck's ear.

"Give up, Buck. I win," he growled.

There was a brief pause, and he could have sworn Buck shivered beneath him. He struggled one last time, almost unseating Eddie, but finally slapped the mat with a loud "Fuck!"

Eddie sat back on the mat, letting Buck get to his knees and smiling when he turned to glare at him. He was right, his chest and face were red as he blushed. 

"I hate you sometimes, you know," Buck said with no real malice.

Eddie grinned wider, "You love me."

Buck looked away quickly, but not before Eddie saw the strange expression across his face. He stood up and offered a hand, pulling Eddie to his feet. Something seemed to have shifted, but he couldn't quite put his finger on it. Buck went to drop his hand once Eddie was on his feet, but Eddie didn't let go.

"Hey, you ok Buck?"

He nodded, smiling a little, "Yeah, my shoulders are killing me though."

Eddie laughed, and resisted the urge to clap his hand on Buck's shoulder, "C'mon, let's get going."


	2. Chapter 2

Buck couldn't shake the fluttering in his chest as once again his mind turned to their "fight". More specifically, Eddie pinning him to the mat and growling in his ear. At first, he had been furious, but then the reality of the situation had sunk in and he couldn't help the heat that had spread through him. When he had felt Eddie's breath on his ear, he thought his heart would stop.

Hope, along with desire, had exploded in his chest. Maybe, just maybe, he wasn't the only one feeling something here. He had struggled, tried his hardest to flip them over and test his theory, but Eddie had too firm of a grip. While it frustrated him, it was nowhere near as powerful as the new wave of desire that had swept through him. He cussed and tapped out, and tried to calm himself as he glared at Eddie's wide smile. 

"You love me," Eddie had said.

And dammit, if it wasn't true. It was like ice water had been poured over his head. He loved his best friend, and it scared the shit out of him. 

As the day progressed, Buck felt himself drawing inward more and more. Eddie had gone back to his normal self, and he started to think he had imagined the connection at the gym. Started to think that it was truly as one sided as it had always felt, and couldn't wait to drown his sorrow in the bottle of wine in his fridge.

Until, that is, Buck went to leave. They had been wrapping gifts for Christopher to open with Abuela, since they had to work on Christmas. They had a few beers each, nothing really concerning, Buck was fine to drive. Eddie had started cleaning up once all the presents were wrapped, and Buck had started to gather his things.

"You're leaving?" Eddie asked, arms full of wrapping paper. 

"Well, yeah, I mean, you've gotta go get Christopher and I figured I'd get out of your way," Buck shrugged.

Eddie's face fell slightly, and Buck felt the heaviness that had settled in his chest lighten just a touch. 

_Ask me to stay, ask me and I'll stay, I'll stay all night if you let me, ask me to stay, ask me..._

"You're never in the way," Eddie said quietly, "But I don't want to hold you up either."

And just like that, the weight was back. Buck forced a smile, gave Eddie a quick one armed hug, and fled.

~~~

Maddie sighed heavily on the phone, "Oh, Buck, just tell him!"

"I can't, Mads. Not yet. I don't know if I can ever, to be honest." Buck pinched the bridge of his nose.

"What's holding you back? It's so obvious, Buck, you guys are crazy about each other."

"It's not that obvious," he rolled his eyes.

Maddie laughed, "Whatever you say."

They hung up shortly after, Chim was coming over and Buck didn't want to keep her. Was he really that obvious? He thought he kept everything hidden, especially at work. As far as he knew, Maddie was the only one who knew he was bi. He was sure no one at the station would judge him, but he just hadn't plucked up the courage to tell anyone. 

He paced up and down his living room, every now and then stopping to take a swig straight from his bottle of wine, mind racing. 

What if Maddie was right? What if everyone knew? What if _Eddie_ knew, and was just too nice to say anything? Hell, that was probably it. He was his friend, so he didn't want to call him out on his dumb crush and make work awkward. 

He finally stopped when he went to take another drink, and the bottle was empty. He frowned, trying to remember when he had run out. With a heavy sigh, he chucked the bottle in the recycling. Well, towards the recycling. It bounced off the rim of the bin and shattered on the kitchen floor, glass skittering in every direction. He knew, somewhere in his mind, that he should probably leave it till the morning, when the walls weren't so fuzzy. 

"Nah, I got this," he mumbled.

He started to gently pick up the larger chunks of glass, stacking them carefully in his palm. When his little tower of glass started to lean, he dumped it in to the bin and started over. Eventually, all the big chunks were gone and it was just the small, annoying beads that were sure to take forever to sweep up.

He sighed, getting to his feet, and picked his way across the floor to the broom closet. As he took the last step, he felt a pinch on the bottom of his foot, and then hot, slick warmth between his toes. He looked down and saw a pool of red spreading across the floor.

"Ah, fuck."

~~~

Eddie killed the engine, sitting in the silence of the drivers seat as he stared at Buck's apartment. It was late, this was stupid. What was he thinking?

He hadn't heard from Buck since he'd left earlier that day, which wasn't that unusual, but something in his gut said this was different, that he hadn't imagined the shift between himself and his best friend. 

Christmas was a little over a week away, maybe they could kiss under the mistletoe..

As he opened the door to the truck, his phone rang, screen flashing "BUCK" 

He smiled, "Hey, funny story-"

Buck cut him off, voice thick and slurred, "Look man, I know it's late, but I can't make it stop bleeding. I need your help."

"Wait, bleeding?" He jumped out of the truck and ran to the door.

Buck didn't answer right away, and Eddie fumbled with his keys until he found the one he was looking for. He jammed it in the lock and wrenched the door open in one motion. He dropped his phone and keys, slamming the door behind him.

"Buck?!" He shouted.

The apartment wasn't big, but in his panic it seemed to stretch forever. The kitchen reminded him of a scene from a murder-mystery novel. Remnants of a shattered wine bottle littered the floor, which was smeared with bright red blood. He felt his stomach flip as he followed the blood to the bathroom, where he found Buck sitting in the tub, his foot wrapped in a bloody towel and propped over the edge.

"What the hell, Buck?" Eddie dropped to his knees in front of him, "What did you do?"

Buck gestured vaguely towards the kitchen, "Missed the recycling, stepped on a piece of glass. S'not as bad as it looks. Thood blinners."

" _Dios,_ Buck. Are you drunk right now?" He slowly unwrapped the towel to reveal a chunk of glass, about two inches wide, had embedded itself in the arch of Buck's foot. "Well, at least you didn't pull it out. C'mon, you need stitches."

Buck shook his head, "You do it." 

Eddie let out an aggravated sigh, "I can't, Buck. We are going to the hospital." 

Again, Buck shook his head, "Don't want to. Just fix me up. I'd do it myself but 'm dizzy. I don't need stitches, there's some tape things under the sink."

Eddie rolled his eyes, "There's a big ass chunk of glass sticking out of your foot, and it's still bleeding. You know you need to go get checked. You're on blood thinners, and you're drunk, which I'm pretty sure is not supposed to happen."

"Ah, shit, you're mad at me." Buck pouted.

The face Buck made as Eddie scolded him almost, _almost_ , broke his resolve. It was like looking at an oversized child. His lower lip actually poked out as he looked up at Eddie through his lashes. Had he not been so angry and worried, he would have been putty in Buck's hands. But, he knew that Buck needed real medical attention. He knew, no matter how badly he wanted to be, he wasn't enough for Buck right this second.

"Buck, querido, you have to get checked out. It'll be quick," Eddie reasoned, "I'm not mad. I'm just worried about you"

Buck shook his head, but held his hand out anyway for Eddie to help him up.

"You're lying," he mumbled as Eddie slipped under his arm to keep him upright, "You get this look when you're mad. Your nostrils flare an' you get this little v between your eyes. An' you have that look right now."

Buck stopped abruptly, almost making Eddie stumble, "Wait. 'm not wearing shoes."

"You can't, Buck, you're lucky I'm letting you hobble," Eddie grumbled. "C'mon, we are wasting time."

Eventually, they made it to the hospital. As Buck was being seen, Eddie paced back and forth, debating on whether or not to call Maddie. He should, she was his sister after all and this was a family situation. On the other hand, if he called her, she might want to take over keeping an eye on him, and the fact that his Tia was staying with Christopher would be kind of pointless. This is not how he'd pictured the night going. 

He also couldn't decide if he was still angry with Buck. He knew better than to drink that much on his medication! 

"Mr. Diaz?" came a soft voice.

He rushed over to the nurse, "Is he ok?"

She smiled, gesturing over her shoulder, "He's all stitched up. He also said you would be the one to talk to about overnight observation? He can go home, we just want him to have someone there just in case the alcohol causes any issues. He seemed very confident you would be with him all night."

He had trouble meeting her gaze, and felt his face grow hot, "I guess I kind of have to now."

She led him back to Buck's room, gave firm lecture on drinking too much, and handed over his discharge papers to Eddie. When she left the room, Eddie crossed his arms and leaned against the wall, and levelled the sternest look he could muster at his friend.

Buck, still too drunk to really grasp the situation, smiled sheepishly at him, "Hey big guy, wanna take me home?"

~~~

Eddie was mad. Eddie was mad and it was all Buck's fault. Clumsy Buck, with his dumb foot and dumb blood thinners. The ride back to his apartment was tense and quiet, the only sound being the occasional sigh from the driver's seat. Buck didn't want to speak and make it worse, so he kept his mouth shut until they were in his living room.

Eddie had just helped him to the couch, but instead of sitting next to him, he walked off towards the kitchen. Buck sat alone, looking at his dumb cut foot. Faintly, he heard the sound of glass moving across the hardwood floor. 

Shit. Eddie was cleaning up his mess. Again. 

He rose carefully and limped in to the kitchen, just as Eddie was bending down to sweep the shattered remains in to the dustpan. 

Whatever he was about to say was lost at the sight of those jeans hugging Eddie's hips, and dammit that perfect ass.

"You should be sitting down, Buck," he said, not even turning his head.

"You don't have to do that, man, I broke the bottle."

Eddie dumped the glass into the bin, maybe a little too forcefully, and went to put the broom away. Ignoring Buck's statement.

There were a few tense seconds of silence, until Eddie emerged again from the broom closet with a rag, bucket, and Pinesol.

Buck moved clumsily across the room to put his hand on Eddie's bicep.

"Dude, stop. You're not cleaning up-"

Eddie wheeled on him, dropping the cleaning stuff and grabbing his wrist. Not hard enough to hurt, but it shocked Buck into silence.

"Buck," he growled, and Buck shivered at the tone, "I am angry. I was scared, worried. Let me calm down, and clean this mess up. Go. Somewhere. Before I _put you_ somewhere."

"It was an accident, Eddie," he said softly.

There was a heavy pause as the two men regarded each other. Buck could see the muscle in Eddie's jaw relax as they stared at each other. He wished his head was clear, maybe then he'd be able to read the emotions swirling in those dark eyes.

Eddie sighed, moving his grip from Buck's wrist, to slightly holding the ends of his fingers. Like he wanted to slip his own fingers between them.

"I'm not mad the bottle got broken. I'm mad that you got drunk, alone, knowing it can fuck with your meds. What if something worse had happened, Buck?"

Buck had no answer. What was he supposed to say? That he got drunk because he was in love with his best friend, and was sad that he didn't have the nerve to tell him? That it was almost Christmas and seeing everyone happy just made him feel more alone?

Eddie's face softened just a little as Buck looked at him. He was right. It was stupid. Obviously, there was a solution here..

"Please, just go back to the couch and wait for me to get this up. Find something for us to watch," Eddie squeezed his fingers before letting go and picking up the cleaning supplies again.

The words were out before they even registered in his foggy brain, "In those jeans? I'd rather watch you."

~~~

Eddie felt his face grow hot, but ignored it.

_He's drunk, he's drunk, he doesn't mean it, he's drunk..._

And yet, as he cleaned, Buck didn't move. He was essentially standing on one foot, with just the barest pressure on his toes of the injured foot, but he was standing there watching all the same. Finally, when the kitchen showed no evidence of the disaster, Eddie looked up to see Buck leaning against the doorway, eyes closed, chin pointing down towards his chest. 

Eddie chuckled and grabbed his elbow, expecting him to jerk his head up and pretend that didn't happen. Instead, Buck threw his arm over Eddie's shoulder and pulled him against him. He tried not to focus on the scent that was just distinctly Buck that was now filling his nostrils, intoxicating him. He had to be the grown up, at least for tonight. 

"C'mon, Buck, let's get you to bed," Eddie sighed.

Between work and their personal time together, Eddie had seen Buck in just about every situation, but he had to admit, sleepy Buck was probably his favorite. Most of his anger had melted away while he was in the kitchen, and he felt the rest of it leave him as he looked down at Buck curled up on his bed.

Maybe he didn't get what he wanted out of this late night visit, but at least he was here. Hell, he wasn't even sure how the night was supposed to go. He started to turn away, planning to go sleep on the couch, when Buck stirred.

"Where you goin'?" He mumbled.

"The couch," Eddie shrugged, although he didn't know why, because Buck's eyes were still closed.

Buck shook his head, reaching one hand out towards Eddie, "Stay here. Stay with me."

That voice, soft and raspy with sleep, damn near broke his heart. He kicked off his shoes and climbed carefully into the bed, jeans and all. Like a heat seeking missile, Buck pressed as close to Eddie's side as he possibly could, sighing as he wrapped an arm around Eddie's waist and settled his head on his chest. Instinctively, his own arm wound it's way around Buck's torso and it was like something just clicked in to place. He took a deep breath to steady himself, feeling the stress from the night slowly start to drain away. 

He was dancing just on the edge of sleep, his body loose and warm and the weight next to him was oh so perfect...

Warm lips touched his neck, moving slowly against his skin, working their way up. Below his ear, along his jaw. Eddie was floating yet grounded all at once. He didn't remember turning but suddenly he and Buck were inches apart, breath mingling between them. Their eyes met, and just as Buck leaned in to close the short distance, the sweet smell of alcohol hit Eddie's nose and he pulled away. 

He was instantly awake, heart racing. How long had he wanted this? But why, why did Buck have to be drunk. He could almost taste him on his lips, but he knew deep down it wouldn't be right. 

Buck stopped, frozen, as horror slowly filled his features.

"Eddie, I.. I thought. I'm s-"

"No, it's ok. Just, not like this." Eddie chuckled. "Sober up, and we'll talk."

Relief washed over Buck's face, "Can we still, ya know, do this?"

Instead of answering aloud, Eddie laid back on the bed and pulled Buck against his side like they had been. Briefly, he pressed his lips to the top of Buck's head.

"Go to sleep, querido." 


	3. Chapter 3

Buck was warm. _Too_ warm. He could feel the solid chest against his back, and for a brief second, forgot how someone had come to be in his bed. When the events of the night before finally made their way to the surface, he for sure thought he would die of embarrassment. He started to slowly ease out from under the arm that was wrapped securely around his waist, but as soon as he moved, the grip tightened and pulled him back.

Yeah, he was definitely going to die, because that was _definitely_ Eddie pressed against his ass. As many times as he had imagined this moment, he never thought it would feel this good. He stopped himself from rolling his hips back and grinding against him. It would be so easy...

But, he really needed to pee. 

Again, he tried to get up without disturbing Eddie. No luck.

"You move too much," he grumbled, breath tickling the back of Buck's neck.

"Let me up, I'll be right back."

Eddie grumbled again, but released his grip. Buck walked into the bathroom, wincing as he put weight on his injured foot. 

He washed his hands, before filling them with water and scrubbing them over his face. He looked at himself in the mirror, eyes too bright in his pale face. Eddie was here, in his bed. He glanced down at the tub, something nagging at him, but he couldn't put his finger on it.

When he walked back to his bed, his heart sank. Eddie was up, standing, sliding on his shoes. 

"I've gotta take Christopher to school," he said quickly, "but I can come back?"

The hopeful note in his voice made Buck's knees weak. He was sure he had imagined it, but no, the expression on Eddie's face backed him up. 

He nodded, "Of course, come back whenever."

Eddie's face lit into a wide smile, and as he passed by Buck, he briefly pressed his lips to his temple.

Then, just like that, Buck was alone again.

He puttered around the apartment, testing the limits of his injured foot. He knew he should probably not be pacing like he was, but he just couldn't help it. His mind was too busy for his body to be still. His phone dinged faintly, and he wandered around till he found it in the tub. He must have dropped it when Eddie showed up. He reached down and picked it up, call log still showing. The top call caught his eye. He knew it was to Eddie, he remembered calling him. The time stamp, though, threw him off completely. 30 seconds. They were on the phone for 30 seconds. But, that couldn't be right. Eddie lived 10 minutes away from his apartment, 8 minutes on a good day with no traffic. But he _remembered_ still being on the phone when Eddie came in. 

The phone dinged again, texts from Athena. Pushing the thoughts of Eddie aside, he opened them. He knew better than to keep her waiting too long.

**Everything is looking good. Bobby is still clear.**

**Xmas should work out also**

He smiled to himself, glad his plan for having a real family Christmas was going as planned. They were supposed to be on duty, but he knew everyone was miserable about it. So, he and Athena were working together to make sure everyone was there. 

He heard the door open, and went back out towards the kitchen. Eddie came in, carrying two coffees and a brown paper bag. He smiled, but Buck could tell it was a nervous one. Dammit, he was so fucking cute.

"Uh, hi," Eddie said shakily.

He dropped his keys on the counter, and it all snapped in to place in Buck's brain. 

Since Bobby's incident, the crew had exchanged keys with at least one member, in case of emergency. Naturally, he gave Eddie a key to his place. He was his best friend after all. 

Last night, he had heard the keys hit the table by the door while he was still on the phone.

"You were already here last night," Buck stated.

~~~

Eddie's mouth went dry, and he tried to swallow past the lump in his throat. What could he say? Buck didn't sound angry, but he wasn't even sure _why_ he had been there to begin with. 

"I, uh, I wanted to talk to you," he said lamely.

Buck nodded, and an awkward silence settled over them. The way he was favoring his foot, Eddie knew Buck must be hurting. He had stopped and grabbed donuts on his way back, but he knew he was too nervous to eat right now. 

"What did you want to talk about?"

Eddie shifted, then jerked his head towards the couch. "Let's sit, you need to get off that foot."

Buck rolled his eyes playfully, "Stalling."

Eddie chuckled, "Maybe. I'm going though."

They settled on the couch, angled towards each other but far enough away that Eddie could almost think straight. He looked over Buck's face, taking it in just in case the affection last night was just a result of the alcohol. Buck seemed to be doing the same, with a soft but guarded expression. 

"I got drunk last night because I was feeling sorry for myself," Buck said suddenly. "And then I got hurt, and called you, but you were already here."

Eddie nodded, "I had just pulled in when you called."

"And you were here because..."

Why was this so hard? The words were there, on the tip of his tongue, but he just couldn't make them come out. Buck's eyes were still on him, and with every silent second that passed, he could see them becoming more and more uncertain. 

He knew how Buck made him feel, the pure joy he felt in his presence. Even on bad calls, he knew Buck would always have his back. He trusted this man with his life, his son's life, but when it came to expressing his feelings, he was at a loss for words.

Buck finally looked away, eyes unusually bright.

"You don't have to let me down easy, you know. You can just say it," he snapped.

"Wait, that's not where I was going at all," Eddie protested. "Buck, I was holding you when we woke up this morning. Do you honestly think I'm trying to 'let you down easy'?" 

Buck's face flushed, but he still wouldn't look at Eddie.

"I just have trouble putting what I'm feeling in to words. Which you know, because you're my best friend," Eddie continued, "And I don't want to do anything that would jeopardize that. Last night was..."

Eddie paused, looking for the right words. Buck maintained his stony faced glare directed at the opposite wall.

"Last night I was drunk and dumb. Today I'm sober and dumb," Buck grumbled

Eddie groaned, "Fuck this." 

He closed the short distance between them, cupping Buck's chin and turning his face towards him. There was the briefest pause as he looked in to Buck's wide, blue eyes before capturing his mouth in a searing kiss.

~~~

Something inside Buck's brain broke as he felt Eddie's lips against his. He knew it, he'd never be the same. He could _feel_ everything Eddie had been trying to say. That he wanted this, wanted _Buck..._

Screw the consequences, forget the real world, _this_ was all that mattered right now. The feel of Eddie's hand on the back of his neck, pulling him closer and guiding him right where he wanted him. When they broke apart, both gasping for air, Buck was seated across Eddie's lap, his hands resting gently on his broad shoulders.

Buck cleared his throat, hoping to sound like he had his shit together, "So, is that what you wanted to talk about?"

Eddie grinned, "Yeah, kind of. It's the general idea. I'm just, not good with words."

Buck shrugged, "I've heard actions speak louder than words anyway."

Eddie chuckled, but said nothing. His hands had wandered to rest on Buck's hips, where they toyed with the hem of his shirt.

"Does this count as jeopardizing our friendship?" Buck asked.

Eddie sighed, and Buck instantly regretted saying anything.

"No, it doesn't for me anyway. I've wanted this for a while, I just didn't know how you felt. And then yesterday, at the gym, I thought something felt different, so I was coming to talk to you about it. And then you were hurt, and drunk..." He trailed off. "When you tried to kiss me last night, I almost let you. But I knew you were drunk, and I didn't want to be a morning after regret, so I pulled away. But I held you all night. I was kind of afraid you'd ask me to leave, so I took what I could get."

Buck snorted, "You could have gotten more if you'd let me kiss you."

Eddie shook his head, but he was smiling, "It wouldn't have been right. I wanted you to want me when you were sober and thinking clearly."

Buck didn't know what to say. He knew Eddie was right, and that he was a good person, but the knowledge that he had turned him down even though he wanted him just because he wasn't sober made something twist inside Buck. He leaned forward and pressed his lips against Eddie's, sliding hands up his neck before curling his fingers in his dark hair. Eddie groaned under him, his hands gripping Buck's hips so tight he was sure they'd bruise.

Buck grazed his teeth along Eddie's lower lip and felt him shiver, fingers convulsing against his hips.

" _Dios,_ " he murmured between kisses. "Buck, slow down."

He shook his head, "Why?"

"Because," Eddie kissed him before pulling back, "We don't have to rush this. I don't just want you physically, I want _us._ I want to take you on dates, and cook you dinner, and embarrass you in public."

Buck couldn't help but laugh. He gave Eddie one last, lingering kiss before moving off of his lap to sit beside him.

"Fine. But now, the real issue: what do we tell the team?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry if the slowness of this is off-putting >_<  
> Comments welcomed!


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yes, the name changed, because the brain-train this story was originally on abruptly jumped off the tracks lol.  
> Don't hate me too much!

At first, Buck had not been happy. Eddie wanted to wait for the "right moment" to break the news to the 118.

Naturally, Buck responded by telling him that was a stupid idea. 

"You don't get it," Eddie sighed. "I want us to figure out being a couple before we go spreading it around."

He snaked his arm out and caught Buck around the waist as he paced by, pulling him flush against his chest with his lips at his ear. "I want to keep you to myself for a while. Is that such a bad thing?"

"It kind of sounds like you want to hide me," Buck murmured petulantly.

Eddie kissed along Buck's jaw, enjoying the way he shivered when Eddie's teeth grazed his skin.

"I'd never want to hide you," he said softly, pulling away to look into Buck's eyes, "Like I said, I just want to keep you to myself. I want us to explore this without everyone else's input and opinions. It's not forever, trust me. I meant what I said about taking you on dates and embarrassing you in public. I want the world to know you're mine, just not yet."

Buck sighed, rolling his eyes dramatically as the smallest hint of a smile played across his lips, "I guess we'll do it your way then, since it means so much to you."

Eddie chuckled just as Buck kissed him. All was well.

~~~

"I really think Cap might win this," Chim nudged Hen and gave the slightest nod towards the trucks below.

Eddie and Buck were cleaning the ladder truck, not that it had even been used on the most recent call. They might have thought it would seem normal, but Hen and Chimney were not buying it at all. 

"When does Buck actually clean willingly?" Hen snorted. "It's like they were just looking for something to do together and away from us."

The two looked at each other, then headed down the stairs.

~~~

"How are we not sick of each other yet?" Eddie laughed softly.

"Because I'm a delight and you can't get enough of me. Also we've had lots of practice," Buck grinned.

Eddie started to respond, but in an instant his expression changed as he addressed someone over Buck's shoulder.

"What's up you two?"

"Oh nothing," Hen said, shrugging, "just coming to bother you guys." 

"I wanna know how you got this one to clean something without pulling any teeth," Chim joked, jerking his thumb towards Buck. 

Buck rolled his eyes and made a face, tossing a sponge at him.

Suddenly, the bells rang and all teasing was forgotten as they headed out.

~~~

"Yes, you big handsome men, please look around my messy apartment!" The blue lady snapped before wincing in pain.

Buck and Eddie eased out of the room awkwardly.

"Well, she's not wrong," Buck mumbled after a moment.

"Dude, don't judge other people's homes," Eddie scolded gently, stopping to check the bathroom.

"I meant the handsome part," Buck winked 

Eddie couldn't help but grin as he rolled his eyes, "Focus babe."

~~~

If Buck could have taken a picture of the moment the 118 saw the surprise family Christmas, it would have been his prized possession.

He was downright giddy, zipping from group to group, basking in the warmth his Found-family generated. He was so caught up in the excitement, he didn't seem to realize how much he gravitated towards Eddie. 

Eddie noticed, and with every pass Buck made around the loft, he felt his heart fill up more and more. He caught Buck's eye, giving the barest nod towards the locker room, and slipped away from the party.

It was only a few minutes, but it feels like hours before Eddie heard Buck come in and lock the door behind him. This had become their spot when they just had to give in. 

"Everything ok?" Buck smiled innocently.

"More than ok. You're amazing," Eddie reached out and pulled Buck against him.

Any words he had planned on saying in that moment were lost as Buck backed him against the wall and kissed him, soft and sweet, building into something so much more. Eddie couldn't help but groan when Buck's hands ran up his chest, when had his shirt come untucked? Fuck it, it didn't matter. All that mattered was the feel of Buck's hands over his heated skin, and letting his own roam wherever they could reach.

He felt his belt start to loosen, and he froze. This was not how he had imagined, whatever was about to happen.

"Wait," he put his hands over Buck's, stilling them, "Not at the station."

Buck sighed dramatically, but didn't argue, "Then we need to get back, and we can continue this after our shift."

"Oh, most definitely. I have to properly, and thoroughly, thank you for making this happen" Eddie kissed him one last time before pushing him away to begin fixing his uniform.

~~~

Hen glanced around, catching sight of Buck, face flushed and uniform wrinkled. Another quick glance showed no Eddie in sight. 

"Oh. My. God. I think it happened," she whispered to Karen.

Karen followed her gaze, then did a survey of her own and nodded towards Eddie leaving the locker room. Unlike Buck, his uniform was smooth and pristine, but he was trying desperately to make his hair look normal, and definitely _not_ like someone had been running their hands through it. 

She and Hen locked eyes in shocked silence, before bursting into a fit of laughter.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter actually came out super short, forgive me! >.<


	5. Chapter 5

"Are you serious?" Chimney whispered, looking over his shoulder.

Buck and Eddie were sitting on either side of Christopher, smiling and laughing.

"I am 99% sure something just went down in the locker room," Hen said.

"But does that count as Bobby winning the bet if they've not made it public? I mean, we really can't _prove_ anything," Karen reasoned.

All eyes turned to Maddie, who blinked before holding her hands up in mock surrender.

"I know nothing. He's not told me anything about any developments. Last I heard it was still just a crush type thing, which I don't feel bad for mentioning because you all already knew."

Athena spoke up from behind the little group, "Even a blind person would be able to tell those two are nuts about each other."

They all murmured in agreement.

~~~

Watching Eddie with Christopher was one of Buck's favorite things to do, and it made him dizzy to think he was now a bigger part of their lives. He couldn't imagine spending Christmas any other way ever again.

"Hey, buddy, can I talk to you for a minute?" Eddie asked the boy softly.

Christopher looked up from the toy he had unwrapped and smiled at his dad.

"So, you know how much you like Buck?" Eddie began, glancing up to meet Buck's eyes nervously.

Buck suddenly found himself without any words to say. He knew Eddie wanted to wait and tell Christopher as well as the team. What was he doing?

"Yeah, Buck's our friend," Christopher agreed, turning to smile now at Buck.

"Right. But, how would you feel if Buck was _more_ than just our friend? If me and Buck started dating?"

Buck thought his heart was going to explode.

Christopher was quiet for a moment, and the boy's silence had never felt so heavy. 

"Abuela was wondering when you would ask him. She thought I wasn't listening," he shrugged, "It'll be fun, dad. You won't have to be alone anymore."

And just like that, Christopher went back to playing with the toy like nothing had happened. Eddie and Buck sighed with relief as their eyes met again over Christopher's messy hair, and they both gave a nervous smile. 

"Besides," Christopher spoke up, surprising them both, "Buck's grilled cheeses are better."

Buck threw his fists in the air, "Victory!"

~~~

 _You can do this,_ Eddie thought to himself.

The were lining up for a picture, Christopher in front of him and Buck by his side, and the rest of his team around him. Eddie had been arguing with himself since their moment in the locker room. While he had thought keeping it to themselves was a good idea at first, he hadn't accounted for being unable to touch him how he wanted, especially when Buck went all out like this. From the second he had realized what Buck and Athena had pulled together for everyone, all he had wanted to do was kiss him under every mistletoe that hung around the loft. Those few stolen moments in the locker room barely scratched the surface.

"On three everyone," Bobby began to count down.

On two, he turned and grabbed Buck's face in his hands. They shared the briefest smile, and kissed each other right as Bobby said "Three!"

Instead of the chorus of "Merry Christmas" the 118 and it's gathered family and friends exploded into cheers, and gasps, and whistles, right as the camera flashed.

~~~

Buck and Eddie wandered up to their group of friends, hands held loosely between them.

"Dammit," Hen teased, "you couldn't have waited like a week?"

"Why, what's in a week?" Buck asked.

"Well," Bobby said as he joined them, "If you had made it to New Year's, We would all be giving Hen $20. But, I bet Christmas, so pay up."

Chimney and Hen groaned, passing over the bills.

"You guys bet on us? Seriously?" Buck looked around, "What was the bet?"

"That you two would finally give in and kiss. I voted for Thanksgiving, Hen said New Year's, Cap said Christmas," Chim shrugged.

Eddie and Buck shared a look.

"Uh, this wasn't our first kiss," Eddie smiled, "We've been together for about, what, a week or so?"

Buck shrugged, returning his smile, "Something like that."

"Doesn't matter, you kissed here, in front of us, on Christmas. So, I win." Bobby shook hands with Chimney and Hen, "Pleasure doing business."

"Were we really that obvious?" Buck asked. 


	6. Chapter 6

The end of their shift came quickly, and soon Buck found himself collapsing on to Eddie's bed. He had originally planned to go home, but Christopher had begged him to come back with them.

So, there he was, stretched across Eddie's bed, listening to him tuck Christopher in.

He didn't realize he had started to doze off until he felt a hand on his shoulder.

He sat up instantly, rubbing his eyes, "I'm up, I'm up."

Eddie chuckled, "Yeah, I'm beat too. I don't even want to shower, but I know I need to."

"Well hurry, then. 'Cause now I want one too." Buck stretched, trying to wake himself up a little more.

"You know," Eddie said softly, "We could shower together. Save water, and time."

Buck looked up at him in disbelief. Did Eddie really just ask him to shower with him?

"Uh," he struggled to find his voice again, "s-sure, we could do that. I guess. If you want."

Eddie didn't reply, just leaned down and kissed the top of Buck's head before pulling his shirt off. Normally, Buck stood a few inches taller than Eddie, but sitting on the edge of the bed put his head level with Eddie's chest, which he now found very very distracting. 

To think, at one point in time Buck had been jealous of the sculpted body before him. Now, all he wanted to do was kiss every inch of it. All fatigue was forgotten as Eddie tilted Buck's chin up and kissed him, grazing his lower lip with his teeth. He groaned softly, trailing his fingers along Eddie's torso before settling on his waist. More specifically, the edge of his belt. 

He ducked his head to kiss along Eddie's chest, drawing a sharp gasp as he gently drew his teeth over a nipple. Buck smiled mischievously against Eddie's skin, this time adding a little more pressure, and slipping his hand down to press against the hard line of his dick.

He felt fingers curl in his hair, pulling his head back. He started to protest, but soon found his mouth occupied with his partner's tongue. Eddie pushed him back on to the mattress and slotted between his legs, grinding against him.

He couldn't remember moving, but when they finally broke apart, Buck was at the top of the bed, with Eddie over him, both in nothing but boxers. At one point he had the vague memory of ripping fabric.

"I thought you were getting a shower," Buck grinned.

Eddie smiled, eyes full of a heat that made Buck's stomach twist and flutter, "Maybe later."

"So, what now then?" 

Eddie's eyes traveled slowly down his body, then back up towards his face, "You tell me, babe. I said I needed to, thoroughly, thank you for making this the best Christmas ever. So, it's whatever you want."

~~~

Eddie thought he would lose any bit of self control he had as he looked down at Buck, biting his lip in a way that was so damn cute and sexy at the same time. He decided he liked Buck almost naked, because he could easily watch the blush spread across his chest, up his neck, and eventually to his face. 

"I, um," Buck stammered, blush deepening, "Fuck. I want you. I want you to fuck me." 

Nope, that was what broke him. What shred of control that was holding him back was long gone as he once again captured Buck's lips with his own. The whole world narrowed down to just them, heated skin and exploring hands. He couldn't help but hiss through his teeth as he felt Buck's hand close around his cock, stroking him. 

He kissed his way down Buck's jaw to his neck, before pulling away and kissing all the way down to his boxers. In one quick motion, he removed the offending fabric and let his eyes trail over him, now completely uninterrupted. He met Buck's eyes, pupils blown and glassy, and slowly took his entire length in to his mouth without breaking eye contact.

It had been a _long_ while since Eddie had gone down on another man, but it took no time at all to remember how to maneuver it down his throat. Buck wasn't massive, but he also wasn't small by any means. He writhed under Eddie, fingers gripping the bed spread as he swallowed around him. He worked his way back up, flicking his tongue across the head before sinking down once again.

Buck moaned loudly and arched his back, pushing deeper in to Eddie's mouth.

He pulled back, wrapping his hand around the base and squeezing gently, "Shh, baby. I wanna hear you, but Christopher's asleep."

"Sorry," came the strangled reply.

He stroked Buck slowly as he worked out of his own boxers, "Tell me again, baby. Tell me what you want."

Buck groaned, rolling his hips forward into Eddie's hand, "Fuck me, Eddie. Please."

~~~

At one point in time, Evan Buckley would have been mortified by the thought of begging someone to fuck him. Those days, however, were far far behind him and every fiber of his being was screaming for Eddie; his hands, his mouth, and finally his cock. 

He couldn't help the groan that escaped him as he felt Eddie press in to him. Even with the prep, Eddie spreading him open and swallowing his moans as they kissed, there was a slight sting as he pushed himself inside. The _fullness_ took his breath away. 

Above him, Eddie hissed thru gritted teeth, "Fuck, baby."

Buck shifted his hips, just barely, and Eddie rolled his forward to meet him. Every thrust became stronger, harder, and soon Buck was burying his head in the pillows to muffle the sounds of his pleasure. 

He thought he would combust, just burn right thru his skin and release his energy in to the cosmos, when he felt Eddie's hand wrap around his cock and stroke in time with his thrusts.

He felt teeth in his shoulder, Eddie letting loose a _dirty_ moan as his body shuddered with his orgasm. Buck wasn't far behind, spilling over Eddie's hand with his name on his lips.

They both stared at each other, trying to catch their breath. Eddie leaned forward and pressed a soft kiss to Buck's lips, humming low in his throat.

"Let's take that shower now." He whispered.


End file.
